What I thought my job would be like:

Me: Hi, I’m the social media intern, and I’m taking a technology usage survey of the office. What do you use to organize yourself?

Someone less hip than me: I use stickies.

Me: Oh yeah, the Windows or Mac kind?

Someone: No, like…stickies. Post-it notes.

Me: Oh it’s third-party? Is it just called “post-it notes”? What version?

Someone: No, like paper stickies. You know, the kind you put on your wall?

Me: Wait, it’s a Facebook app?

Someone: No, you put them on a REAL wall. What’s wrong with you??

Me: Oh sorry! REAL stickies! THAT’s what you meant.

Someone: Yes.

Me: So tell me, REALLY though, what do you use to organize yourself? It’s iCal isn’t it?

What my job is really like:

Someone else: So, I’m on Facebook now.

Me: Awesome! How do you like it?

Someone: Well, it’s ok, except I don’t really like being friended by all these people I don’t know that well. Plus I’m concerned people can see the info on my profile if they’re not my friend, also I don’t want my picture or name to show up in searches, and I think it’s too much trouble trying to find people and friend them. I mean, I’m kind of a private person.

Me: Hmm.

Someone: So, is there a setting to make it do what I want?

Me: Yes. So click ‘Account’, ‘Account settings’, and ‘Deactivate my account’.

Someone: But that will deactivate my account!

Me: Yes.

Someone: That sounds like too much trouble. I’ll do that later. Also, I have a lot of viruses. Do you know how to get rid of them?